Our brain is an amazing machine. Its potential continues to amaze scientists. Each time, they seem to rediscover for themselves this amazing organ. The brain is capable of higher functions, achievements, and achievements, however, only a small part of people actually realized themselves and revealed their internal reserves. There are very few of those who have achieved truly incredible success. What prevents a person from effectively using his mental functions? Every person wants to live a full and hectic life. But this is usually hampered by various factors. One of them is self-doubt. It affects many people, regardless of gender and age. But how to overcome self doubt?
The monster in the US
Self-doubt has several names: lack of confidence, feeling insecure, shyness, low self-esteem, lack of self-confidence, etc. but a rose, no matter how you call it, smells just as good, and in our case, it is just as thorny. This is not a beautiful flower, but a sharp thorn of distrust. The reverse of trust. Fear. Self-doubt is a fundamental obstacle because it prevents us from starting. When you don’t know what to do, it gets scary. Fear blocks the action and instills a sense of vulnerability. A person begins to doubt his own abilities, ingenuity, strength, success. Attention goes from what needs to be done to self-defense, which leads to a stalemate.
How to spot an obstacle
A certain barrier causes characteristic human behavior. If in doubt, it is hesitation. Main Action: you hesitate the person is ready to act but hesitates to take a step. He stands at the edge of the springboard and thinks that he should jump, but does not jump. He stops moving to the goal.
What are the signs of self-doubt?
Do you believe that …
… there are more problems than your ability to solve them.
You think that you do not have the skills, talent or strength to cope with the task.
… you have nothing to offer.
What you have to say has no value; you can not influence the lives of others, give something good to the world, and what you want to communicate is of no interest to anyone.
… you’re doing your best.
You take the charge by yourself so as not to strain too much. It seems that many things in life are not available to you, so you need to moderate your appetite.
… when you want to oppose, you have to agree, especially at work.
Even when you feel good, you prefer to seem kind and accommodating rather than a conflicted argumentative. You will not address your boss about a career advancement or salary increase. Don’t talk about problems. You follow all the rules, but you seem to lack initiative, insecure, devoid of aspirations.
Hidden mechanism to overcome self doubt: failure to suppress fear
One of the most important functions of the brain is to protect a person. When the brain detects a threat, it activates the sympathetic nervous system, the part of the nervous system that controls the response to acute stress, better known as the fight or flight response.
This ancient neurological mechanism prepares the body to respond to a potential threat. As soon as a person finds himself in a situation that could threaten his well-being, this primitive part of the brain sends signals to different areas of the body to prepare them for a reaction. Heart rate, pressure, respiratory rate, the work of sweat glands, blood vessels, bladder, muscles change-everything must work so that a person can either cope with the threat, or be able to escape as quickly as possible in the opposite direction. When the brain concludes that there is no threat, it releases the sympathetic nervous system and hyperactivity decreases.
The concept of “fight or flight” was introduced in 1929 by Walter Cannon, who described the reaction of animals to danger with this term. Over time, scientists have discovered a similar mechanism in humans, it includes a chain of four possible reactions, which is conventionally called so: “freeze – run – hit – abandon”. The first reaction is to freeze. Faced with a potentially dangerous situation, the person focuses on the stimulus and tries to understand how to proceed.
For example, if you walk through a forest and notice a fire, it is clear that fire is a threat to you. You put aside other things and focus your attention on danger. Then comes the choice of reaction: fight or flee. If it’s just a fire that is not extinguished, you can trample it. If you have an unleashed element of a forest fire in front of you, you will do your best to run in the opposite direction with a call for help.
Although the dangers have changed, the brain’s response has remained the same. As soon as he notices a threat, he activates the “freeze – run – hit – surrender” reaction. Faced with something potentially dangerous, a person freezes. Then he begins to think about what to do next. Depending on the severity of the situation, he can fight or retreat. And if neither can be done, the person gives up, remaining in a numb state.
If he decides that there are neither opportunities nor resources to solve the problem, he will gradually absorb the person. For example, we learned that your company plans to reduce its staff. You freeze, stop and listen. And then what? Fight, fight? Go to the boss and find out the details? Analyze the contract and performance indicators to find arguments in your favor? Or maybe speed up the pace and show how valuable you are? Or is it better to run away? Start looking for another job, claim compensation and prepare an application for unemployment benefit? If you can not resolve to do any of the above things, the abandon mode will activate.
How to overcome self doubt: overcome an obstacle
Self-doubt is caused by fear. It turns on when the brain begins to respond to anxiety, although there is no real danger. To avoid this, it is necessary to train the brain to suppress unnecessary fears. The strategies listed below are aimed at dealing with fear. To disable the automatic occurrence of fear, you need to get used to this emotion. It is more likely to appear in a new and supposedly dangerous situation, and after repeatedly coping with an unusual task, the brain stops reacting excessively and gets used to it. In other words, if you periodically put yourself in the situations that you fear most, you can overcome fear and, accordingly, overcome the barrier. Managing doubts is developing self-confidence. The threats are no longer terrifying and the challenges are no longer perceived as insurmountable and exorbitant.
overcome self doubt _Strategy 1: do not be shy
It is not easy to advertise, because you are your most picky critic. But if you can not convince yourself of your own worth, you will not succeed in others, even more so. Get in the habit of complimenting yourself regularly. Remember your qualities and rejoice in them. The next three exercises should make you think about your strengths. The more seriously you take them and the more you think about them, the more surprised you will be with the results. Feel free to share your thoughts with someone you trust.
Exercise 1. Write an ad about yourself
If you are already in a romantic relationship, write an ad that will convince your partner or spouse to go out with you. You know what he likes about you, so emphasize these qualities. If you are not a couple, write an ad that attracts the person you want to date. Describe yourself so that he can see why you will improve his life.
Exercise 2. Write a cover letter for the job of your dreams
Imagine preparing a cover letter in response to the job offer of your dreams. This is a rare and unavoidable opportunity, so try to list all the reasons why the company should offer you a job and the benefits it will get if you become an employee.
Exercise 3. Write a letter of recommendation
In this exercise, to overcome self-doubt write about yourself in the third person. Depending on the stage of life, you can contact:
- a) to the admissions office and try to help the candidate (you) enter the University;
- b) to the employer and try to convince him to accept this candidate (you) to work;
- c) an owner, loan manager, business partner, or any other person that person (you) is trying to impress.