As parents, we want our children to get the best out of life and be ready for any challenge that life can throw at them. No one wants their child to grow up weak and weak-willed and be unable to achieve success. In this case, is there a way to prepare children for the upcoming life path and ensure their success? After all, it is not enough to want something, you need to work and develop in this direction. So let’s see the goal setting for kids tips.
goal setting for kids: What not to do
An effective way to develop your children’s personality and implement your plans for their and/or her future is to set goals. Here we can distinguish two main tasks: to teach the child to control their emotions and to instill skills to solve problems. Armed with these abilities. Your children will be able to overcome almost any difficulties that may stand in the way of their development.
There are certain points that should be taken into account when setting goals for children. Do not get carried away too much and do not come up with unrealistic goals that do not correspond to the age of the child. Many parents, even if they are far from perfect themselves, become perfectionists when it comes to children. They want to bring up a young genius from their child. And they make goal setting their own tool. Initially incorrect motives of parents can have unpleasant consequences for the future of children. For example, a child will become withdrawn, unable to bear the weight of parental expectations.
You don’t have to go far for examples. I will tell you such a case from my life. A familiar girl, let’s call her Valeria, was brought up by her father harshly. He himself did not manage to make a sports career at the time. But he decided to beat out his daughter as a master of sports at least. And she almost reached this level – she received a candidate for master of chess, constantly participated in competitions. And she hated chess with all her heart – so tired of the game itself, and the constant pressure of her parent. Having got rid of his guardianship, the girl abandoned her sports career. However, after a long time, I was able to return to chess – but only as an optional and non-binding hobby.
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Goals are simple, complex, and all sorts of things…
It is important that parents understand the true purpose of goal setting for kids before they take any action. You should be a guide for your children and help them move in the right direction. But do not go the tempting-easy way of manipulating, turning the child into the person that you think he should become.
The sooner you start working on your goals, the better. Let their complexity grow with your children, and then you can expect a teenager to make more complex and responsible choices when solving difficult tasks.
However, it is not necessary to put your children and too simple goals. Because of which the child may have the erroneous opinion that he can get what he wants from life with minimal effort. Ideally, parents should set goals that challenge the child, promote their development, but do not deprive them of self-confidence. Doesn’t sound very clear in theory, does it?
goal setting for kids: Where to start
Before you take on the role of “task Manager” for your small (or not – so-small) performer, assess the emotional state of the child. That is, if the child is tired or depressed, it is better not to load it too much during this period. But if the mood is upbeat, and the energy is right bubbling – it’s time to solve difficult problems. In other words, the level of difficulty of the task is directly proportional to the child’s ability to complete it.
Since parents have more experience and common sense, it seems, too, moms and dads will play the role of moderators. Stand over what is happening, suggest ways to solve the problem to the child, give advice and provide support. Tell your children that life can give them a lot of unpleasant surprises, build unexpected obstacles – and you need to prepare for this. And it is not necessary to know the only correct way to destroy the problem. What you really need is to remain positive and ready to solve the problem, using all your knowledge, talents and ingenuity. The motto can be taken: “Try until you can’t.”
And here positive examples will help very much to convey your ideas to the child. Tell them about the Paralympians who overcame their infirmities and failures. Albert Einstein, who did poorly in school, and later discovered the theory of relativity. Stephen Hawking, who had a serious illness and paralysis did not prevent him from becoming one of the greatest scientists of his time. About actors who failed every audition in the world, but did not lose faith in themselves and eventually became real stars. Oh, I’m sure you can find your own inspirational examples.
READ THIS : Easy Goal Setting and Vision Board for Kids
“Try until you can’t.”
And in our daily lives, we can find people who have overcome circumstances. Some of them would probably say: before throwing all your energy into solving a problem or task, think through all possible and available solutions, and then act.
Just don’t get hung up on it. It often happens that when we focus on the details, we do not dare to act for a long time. Setting real and achievable goals gives children a valuable lesson: don’t worry too much about mistakes or failures. Act boldly and do not be afraid of defeats – they are always just a stage, not the end of the road.
Just like the popular saying: “Even if you are swallowed, you always have two ways out.”
Teach your children that even if they don’t know what to do or where to start, it doesn’t mean that the attempt will fail. Let them start to solve some problem – and inspiration, good ideas will come by themselves in the process. It is only necessary to focus on the various possibilities that any situation already contains.
“Keep your nerves in check»
Another, if you want, “rule” of goal setting for kids helps them learn to keep their emotions in check. Reckless, impulsive actions and lack of self-control can in the future play the role of an obstacle, a restriction on the development of the child’s personality. Of course, toddlers and even teenagers can’t control themselves as well as adults. But the earlier you sow these seeds, the faster they will sprout. And the better your son or daughter will be able to control their impulses in everyday life. This is why the ability to manage your feelings and desires is so important for achieving goals.
Take for example the system of parenting adopted in Japan. The little Japanese is the king and tyrant of his family. Everything is possible for him, the baby is pampered and indulged in everything. But when the child reaches the age of five, it enters a completely new world. A world of strict rules, etiquette, and responsibilities. Some of the customs and rules of behavior he receives in the form of a game. But many things are instilled by parents and society through direct prohibitions and orders. Aren’t these the rules of parenting that make Asians (Japanese, Chinese, and Koreans) so effective and successful?
“Stronger than all-self-possessed”
Self-control is just a habit that you can instill in your children from an early age. Most guys find it difficult to control themselves. Because for them, a momentary desire is something completely natural, requiring immediate satisfaction. But if you set small tasks for the child from time to time, he will gradually become able to subordinate his desires and emotions to the will.
Let’s take an example. The child dreams of a toy, book, etc. Let’s say that pocket money is given to him once a week. Ask them not to spend all their money at once, but to save the necessary amount, saving money for pocket expenses in a piggy Bank. Choosing whether to buy something really desirable in the future or spend all the money on momentary desires right now, the child learns to make decisions and take responsibility for their choice.
Another example. The child does not want to do homework, but wants to go for a walk with friends right after school. You could explain to him that by putting aside the fun games for a while to complete his homework, he will then get an extra free hour.
These are small examples of setting goals for children that will teach them to restrain their desires and help them acquire a practical approach to life.
goal setting for kids: Be series
when defining goals for children, it is very important to provide them with “feedback”. It is important to increase your child’s confidence level and help them evaluate themselves objectively. When the child has achieved the intended result, you can discuss what ways and means he achieved the goals, whether you approve of them. Be honest and don’t waste time trying to raise your children’s self-esteem. If you praise a child unfairly, he will not be able to form an adequate opinion of himself, and in the future, it may bring trouble to him and others.
goal setting for kids is necessary. So that their personalities develop and they learn to look at life in a positive way. You don’t need to focus on winning or losing as such. It’s better to take each event as a lesson and a source of useful experience. In the end, the parent’s task is to develop goals so that the child can manage on their own and does not feel pressure at any stage. If you succeed, setting goals can be a very effective tool for education and training.