Afraid of losing a loved one you already had a bad dream, after which you woke up in a cold sweat and feverishly began to dial the number of the person with whom something happened in the nightmare? A familiar feeling, is not it? Good day, reader! Today we will talk with you about a very interesting and common fear of all ages. Fear of losing a loved one. I write, and the most unpleasant creeps stick to the spine.
Fear of losing a loved one: Hello from the past
Experts are accustomed to believing that most phobias are formed in a person due to problems in childhood or as a result of accidents or psychological trauma. It’s no secret that children are very attached and dependent on their mother from the first days.
This connection is permanent but very strong, and if it is interrupted for certain reasons and it makes the child nervous, worried, thinking that he can lose, based on the experience gained, understanding comes and the child begins to be afraid of losing.
According to the same scenario, the fear of losing a father develops, and due to the loss of a father in childhood, a future woman can develop the fear of losing her partner, etc.
Our fears are a huge snowball, which grows larger every year, if you do not find the reasons for their appearance and do not try to eradicate them.
All ages are subject
Phobias arise for various reasons, caused both by external stimuli and internal disorders. Sometimes several reasons merge into one, and getting rid of them becomes even more difficult. It would seem that in children it simply gets stuck in the brain and grows with it, as a result. It takes a particularly sophisticated form and causes more discomfort.
But adults suffer no less from The appeared fears, which they can change in their minds. The problem is that the basis for understanding a phobia is once again personal experience, that a twenty-year-old person is more than two years old. As a result , we conclude that the moment when fear arises does not matter, it is important – where and how to deal with it.
Self-doubt. Unfortunately, many people do not like each other enough because of external circumstances; they constantly compare themselves with others, minimize their dignity, underestimate their importance.
When people with low self-esteem enter into a relationship, friendly, loving, they often ask the question: “Why me?”, Which eventually turns into “most likely, it’s temporary, you’ll leave anyway.” This is the first step towards the development of a Fear of losing a loved one.
Negative experience. Personal experiences and observations of the experiences of another person (most often also of a loved one) can be classified as negative experiences. It can be the grief of Love passed after a breakup, prolonged stresses leading to rupture, or loss of a loved one due to an accident or a natural death.
Fear of losing a loved one
Autophobia. Or in another way, fear of loneliness. Today this can happen to everyone, because many people, despite the mobility of the modern world, feel lonely. Communication has been replaced by social networks. The desire to earn money leads us to different parts of the planet, and human relations are gradually depreciating (as evidenced by the growing divorce rate, for example).
And when you have someone near you, you feel like an exception, because inside the thought, ” and so suddenly …?”May begin to emerge.
Obsessive States . In psychology, obsessive states are now commonly called minor personality disorders. The degree of their manifestation can be different, so they can take place both in a ” closed form “(a person may not even guess what he has) and in an” opening ” (when a person knows about a problem and works on it).
Arising from constant daily stress, obsessive states push a person even more into him and contribute to an increase in the level of anxiety, distrust, restlessness.
The desire to control it turns out that the fear of loss arises from the desire to control everything in your life, to influence it. These people lose their marks when something goes wrong and begin to cling to the main constants of their environment: people.
Can I handle it?
The consequences of being surrounded by such fear can be disastrous. It all starts with disturbing thoughts and can end with serious health problems:
- pressure problems;
- sleep problems (insomnia or restless sleep);
All this is produced on the basis of nerves and, of course. The nervous system will not say thank you for it.
A sober view of life
Many will ask the question: How to solve this problem? The answer is simple and hidden within ourselves and depends only on us.
If we understand where this fear comes from, then half the work is done. It is enough to exclude the factor of influence on the psyche and go further. What does it mean to exclude a factor? It is worth thinking about the fact that, perhaps, there are events and things that do not depend on us and we need to learn to accept them. You need to work on yourself and on the acceptance of problem situations, attitudes towards them. It is necessary to spend more time with relatives and friends, take care of them. Because it is often forgotten, dissolving in everyday life and getting bogged down at work.
Aromatherapy, herbal teas, breathing exercises, sports will help get rid of physical nervousness, which is important when a person tries to overcome himself.
If you understand that you can not solve the problem yourself, contact a specialist. The psychologist will provide the necessary assistance and select the most effective treatment.
And do not be afraid to talk about your fears and phobias with your family and friends. They better than all specialists will help you cure your mental anguish.
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